​When I was preparing my retreat, Seeking the Hope in Trusting in God, My Pastor recommended I listen to the amazing CD presentation by Bismarck Diocese Vocations Director, Fr. Tom Richter’s talk about overcoming the obstacles to trusting God entitled, Trust in the Lord (Lighthouse Media). So many of what Fr. Richter had to say profoundly touched my heart.

After listening, I was filled with encouragement that I too could learn to trust God.  However, the most powerful insights came from this little parable (paraphrased):

Three preschool children are having a play date at the park.  Two are enjoying the slides and swings, building castles in the sandbox, and then engaged in a game of hopscotch.  The third is pacing, wringing his hands and looking very forlorn. The friends approach their worried friend to inquire why he has not joined them in playing. “How could I,” he begins, “I have so much on my mind. I have no idea how I will pay the mortgage this month, put food on the table, or pay the heating bill.”  He pauses, looks at his joyful friends and asks, “Aren’t you concerned about these things too!” “Nah,” they both quickly respond, “we just let our Dad take care of all of that.”

How often do fail to see that God, the Father, truly is our Dad.  In the Scriptures, St. Paul refers to God as Abba, Father. Abba translates into daddy. God is our beloved Daddy, there to help us with all those difficult and worrisome circumstances in our lives that we may be causing us dismay or anxiety.

​He knows our needs, long before even we do – shelter, clothing and food – and has promised in to provide those necessities.

When we first adopted our daughter, Faith, she completely rejected me. We could not even be left alone because she would cry herself into a frenzy and be physically ill.  I was heartbroken.  This heartbreaking rejection came after nearly two years of waiting to be matched with her and six additional, agonizing months waiting for approval from China to travel to bring her home.

​My excitement to be able to finally cuddle with my daughter and start to build our mother/daughter bond and she wanted absolutely nothing to do with me.  Distraught by this turn of events, I began to pray in earnest to the Lord for consolation and direction.

​As an early educator for nearly 15  years, I knew that trust bonds were built by seeing a child’s need, meeting in quickly and efficiently, and repeating the cycle again and again.  I told my husband that for the remainder of our time in China, I would be in charge of every possible physical need Faith had. I needed to illustrate for her that I was trustworthy.

So for nearly two weeks every bath, potty break, tooth brushing, and morsel of food — came exclusively from me. The doctor on the trip, assured us the rejection of one of the two caregivers was normal and with patience, love, and persistence this stage would pass.  My husband, Kevin and I were grateful for how quickly and completely she’d at least taken to her new dad.

​How overwhelming and fearful all this activity must have been for her; exacerbated by possessing limited language ability to have what was happening explained or to express her feelings. Faith is profoundly deaf and had yet to be taught any means of communication at that point — who knows how frightening that lack of awareness of the good that was actually happening made this experience  was for her.

Shortly before leaving China, the Holy Spirit inspired a very profound thought in my heart.  For years, I had been away from the Church; yet God, my Father, had continued to watch over my comings and goings; generously providing the necessities, and much more, in my life.

My rejection of His love, affection, and desire to be close was no different than what I was experiencing with Faithy. Just as He had faithfully provided my every need until I was ready to accept him in my life; I would do the same for her.  And I did just that for over three heart-wrenching weeks, until one day Faith came to me, crawled up into my lap, and cuddled up against my chest. It was the beginning of a very beautiful, trust-filled relationship.

Courage to trust in the Lord’s plans come sometimes with moving in them even when we are completely unsure where He is taking us.

Trust may require looking back at all He has done for us, to recognize how providential and loving He has always been.

Trust is not being paralyzed by what is happening or what may come but to remember that we are not alone — the Lord never abandons us. He accompanied us in the past, now in the present, and will continue to do so in the future.

Most importantly, He loves us with an everlasting love and has it all under control.

First Appeared on Catholicmom.com, June 2015
All Rights Reserved, Allison Gingras 2018